To err is human, to forgive, divine.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E7zwQ_7q-fU
Forgiveness is not always the easiest path. Satan would have us believe that the other person does not deserve forgiveness, or that they need to pay for what they have done. Sometimes we really want to believe those things, especially if what has happened to us is very painful.
However, the Lord has said that vengeance is His. He has also said "I the Lord will forgive whom I will forgive, but of you it is required that ye forgive ALL men." D&C 64:10 He doesn't suggest that this might be a nice thing to do. Or that you can pick and choose who you will forgive. It says "required" and "all".
Forgiveness brings healing to the forgiver and the forgiven. It brings a peace that cannot be found through worldly means. It breaks down walls that are blocking forward progression.
So how does one get to the point as this man did of forgiving someone? How do you get passed the pain that another person's actions have caused?
It can be done. The solution is beautiful in its simplicity. Love them and pray for them. I know how hard it can be, and how easy it can be. It is easiest when you allow the Savior to help you. It is hardest when you try to do it on your own.
I was held in Mexico for four months by a person that had promised to love and cherish me. For me it was quite literally Hell on earth. I was beaten, starved and threatened with death. I was abused physically, sexually, emotionally and mentally. For a brief time I thought I was going to die there and never see my family again. Through a series of miracles my family found out where I was and what was happening to me and orchestrated my rescue. I had lost between 60-80 pounds in those four months and my body was so malnourished that a common virus turned into a ravaging illness that left my skin yellow and me so weak I couldn't even walk a block without needing to stop and rest for several minutes. For weeks after I got back into the States I was so angry, at him, at the people that had helped him hurt me, at myself for even going down there in the first place. I fantasized about death, for me, for him, for his family. For me quick and painless, for his family painful but short and for him lingering torture. Weak and angry I went before the Lord, recognizing that it was His hand that guided my path and led me out of there safely, I pleaded with him. I knew that I could not claim to be a good Christian with so much hate in my heart, and I knew that I could not deny the tender mercies of Christ. So I prayed that I could forgive the people that had hurt me and forgive myself. It was hard to pray for them at first. The words stuck in my throat. I would pray a prayer within the prayer, for the desire to want to say those words. "Help me forgive" A sweet peace came over me, that scripture from Romans came to my mind "Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord." Suddenly my prayer changed, a fervent prayer that this family that had caused me so much pain would find and accept Christ into their lives. Why? Because I realized that no evil idea that I could come up within my little human mind could equal the wrath of a Just and Vengeful God. They needed the Atonement to forgive them of their sins against me as much as I needed it to be able to forgive them and be healed.
Now unlike this man, I have no clue the affect my forgiveness of this family has had on them. I hope that in some cosmic way, they feel it and that their lives are better. I know that my life is better because of it. The Lord doesn't command us to forgive so that the other person feels better. He commands it of us because it allows us to move forward without bitterness. He knows our pain, and He counts our tears and through forgiveness, heals us.
Wow, Kiersten. Thank you for sharing such a personal and powerful story. I am glad that you were able to find peace through forgiving those who were so terrible to you. I'm grateful to you for the reminder of what it means to forgive and how it can help us.
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